It's just a memory...Gone forever

You can play this song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MAIdrbYiUB0 while reading this shit below.

I had thought about this as I was driving home tonight. Way before I listened to a song that's lyric inspired the title of this rambling / writing / mental health journal / diary / whatever the fuck.
Has it been six years? I can't remember. I just used a calculator it has.

Apparently, my fat Uncle is likely selling a house where our clan used to rendezvous for occasions. It doesn't hold those occasions anymore.

It's just a house after all.

But, to me it is the Mackie Compound. Always will be.

I had over the years dreamed about buying it one day.

I haven't been back there though. As in inside.

I don't think it would be good.

Yet, I would want to buy it, one day? Makes sense to me.

They're entitled to do as they please. The fact of the matter was the place was left for them, because their son (my cousin) really never had an established home. Legend has it my Grandfather said it was so they would always have a place to stay.

Now that won't be happening it seems.

Cue my montage of making a lot of money and buying it off whoever the fuck gets it one day.

Anyhow, that kind of pissed me off. But, I've never been a dick to think I've been entitled to any inheritance. I think it is tacky to expect anything after someone dies. If it happens, cool. It would be much better to have the person alive than their material possessions they left you. Unless, of course they were a big pile of dino shit.

When I was driving home tonight along Lakeshore. I thought you know, if I only knew then what I know now. So cliche eh...

Those faces, those people that loved and cared about me. Are just a memory. Gone forever.

I thought wow, I would ask them about this and just find out more about them. Be a better person.

Sometimes people are asked would you ever change anything about yourself or wish you were some age again? I'd say my experiences led me to where I am now. I'd for sure like to just hear a voice once more. Be able to hug them one last time. Feel that warmth. But, again that feeling is gone forever.

Here I am. Here I am.