I thought

Most of it went well last night.

The ending wasn't the best. I realized I asked her to see me on her birthday which was selfish, and her day off.

It seemed like I almost got that 2nd shot.

I found out you still has feelings for me. That was good to know.

I need to make improvements on my anger management and better finances.

Will she care if I start after we meet again?

Today I am really low. I am upset. And overwhelmed.

The week is a cooling off period, time is a good thing.

But, it hurts so much. I feel like what I say can't convince her, that I can change.

I know you said you like sticking to a decision, but, please. Just let me change.

It isn't changing the core of my being.

You haven't treated me bad.

Without you in my world it is killing me. You're not responsible for that. But it is killing me. It isn't that I rely on you that much. It is what you mean to me. It is that I love you, and I want to make you happy, and feel loved and to never doubt us.

I am looking forward to next week and to seeing you.

I hope I have some luck of the Irish.